I gather February is National Haiku Writing Month.
I write no haiku. This poetic form has quite exacting conventions and a long history. I suspect it would take considerable study and practice to become proficient in it, but many in the West seem to perceive it as “quick and easy poetry.” The result is a lot of of polysyllabic word-clumps intended to convey some fleeting notion. Or maybe I’m being disrespectful of well-meaning haiku writers.
I was shoveling spam out of my email inbox the other day. Most of the time I hit the “empty spam” button without looking at what is about to be flushed. But a couple of gem-like phrases caught my eye. I noted them down.
Rearranged a bit, here they are:
Body is a baggage for life / Protect stomach lining / Better tomorrow starts now.
Starry mood? / The energy of bright feelings / Just enables.
Quick start, long action! / Life is well when you take the right meds! / Be confident!
Afraid to fall? / Do not push me / You’re mighty!
You will note that these word-strings do not contain the 5-7-5 syllables prescribed for haiku. That, among other reasons and with apologies, is why I call them pseudo-haiku.
Feel free to guess what the spammers were trying to sell.
“Spam” image courtesy of Pixabay.